I was part of a family as soon as I was born yet nothing taught me family more than having my own son. That made the Holy Family come alive and I don’t think meditating on the Joyful mysteries of the rosary will ever be the same. And I think those mysteries are an excellent way to enter into the world of that family today.
Before I begin, I want to talk about St. Joseph, especially because it’s the year of St. Joseph announced by Pope Francis. I used to think that the holy family–and thus, St. Joseph–were this perfect, and therefore ALIEN family unit. Not so anymore. I just think of the first time my husband transported our son in his car–he drove like a grandpa! He went the most stress-free route, drove the speed limit or below and thought of our son in the back seat the whole time. I imagine that St. Joseph felt all those tender feelings. Just because we call him the foster father of Jesus doesn’t mean he didn’t have all those same feelings for Jesus and Mary. I’m sure he had a beautiful relationship with Mary, held her hand and spoke of their doubts and fears, and felt a sinking feeling in his body if anything bad were to happen to them. And can you imagine: He was the only sinner in the family! He was “a just man” yet you can imagine even a just man could have fallen in little ways while living alongside Jesus and Mary and found humility in it (Matthew 1:19).
The Joyful mysteries! Mary became pregnant with Jesus. I remember when I found out I was pregnant with my son–Oh, what joy! Who would have thought–I certainly had no idea. We had wanted it for several years–we just didn’t know when would be the right time with my health. We had only just begun thinking: now is the right time. What did Mary feel? I can imagine JUST AS MUCH if not MORE joy than I did when I saw that little criss cross on the pregnancy test. My husband was making Sunday brunch pancakes and that little announcement made the ordinary extraordinary. It was the beginning of God-given time, consecrated with hormones that gave me an impermeable glow. I’m sure it was no different for Mary–it was the beginning of the most beautiful time of her life: her life with Jesus, beautiful baby and Savior of her people.
The second mystery: the Visitation. I love this mystery for imagining Mary and Elizabeth hugging with their belly bumps. This mystery has always been special to me because it is focused on a friendship between two women. Blessed be God! And the most beautiful prayer, the Magnificat, about the rise of the lowly, proclaimed between them. I want all my friendships to be so sacred.
The third mystery: the birth of Jesus. This mystery can never pass me by without thinking of “the golden hour.” This hour is what babies experience with the mother, immediately after being birthed. It is a time to bond and to recover from the trauma of entering the world. I read about it in books and learned it’s important for babies if there are no complications with birth. I had the blessing of experiencing this with my son and I will never forget it. He finally came out, the nurses patted him dry, spanked him and suctioned his mouth and nose and plopped him within SECONDS onto my chest! I immediately began talking to him. He cried and cried then soon enough he found my eyes. He stared at me, hardly blinking, for the rest of that hour. I will never forget those eyes. He needed me. Imagine Mary seeing those eyes from Jesus. He was just a baby. He needed her.
The fourth mystery: the Presentation. This is the ultimate family mystery for me! Joseph, leading the donkey, wanting Mary and newborn Jesus to have the safest journey. Right after my son’s birth, the day or two after, we had to take him to Quest Lab for bloodwork because he had jaundice. My husband and I entered the busy lab in the middle of Covid times and huddled in a corner knowing our son had a STAT label so we’d get seen soon. I have never felt such unity with my husband as we did taking care of our son those first few days. Like I said before, just because Joseph was the foster father, I don’t think his feelings were much different. Maybe they stayed up late talking about Jesus and he probably was a total papa bear whenever they had to go anywhere, in this case, the temple. I love thinking about his tender, very human relationships, with Mary and Jesus. How they huddled together to buy his “pair of turtledoves, or two young pigeons” (Luke 2:24b) and the great surprise of meeting Simeon and Anna. It was probably St. Joseph’s special role to navigate them through.
The fifth joyful mystery: the finding in the temple. This one is a little funny because Joseph and Mary probably FELT like the WORST parents!
His parents did not know it, but supposing him to be in the group they went a day’s journey…and when they did not find him they returned to Jerusalem…And his mother said to him, “Son, why have you done this to us?”
Luke 2:43-45, 48
I was meditating on this mystery and it came to me: it would be as if my son grew up and at age 12 was nowhere to be found and we finally found him at the cathedral, arranging flowers in the Our Lady of Guadalupe chapel. You know it. That’s how it’s a joyful mystery. He’s a baby now but I could just see his delicate fingers handling flowers and giving them to Mary with all the love in his heart. Blessed be God. After the Finding in the Temple:
…he went down with them and came to Nazareth and was submissive to them.
Luke 2:51
And his mother treasured up all these things in her heart.
This is my final reflection: Jesus, Mary and Joseph were always going back home to Nazareth and treasuring that time they had as a family. After the Presentation:
…when they had performed everything according to the Law of the Lord, they returned into Galilee, to their own town of Nazareth.
Luke 2:30
Even when Joseph “rose and took the child and his mother by night and departed to Egypt” they returned after “the death of Herod.” (Matthew 2:14, 15) I think of our Lady of Loretto: pilgrims transported a house from Nazareth to Italy that supposedly Mary grew up in where they all lived. Their home. What a blessed place. The very first domestic church. They were always going back to it; and when Jesus’ life went public, it was how he was known. I love thinking of that in these times we are all home so much. Jesus, Mary and Joseph didn’t have the means to travel much unless it was absolutely necessary–Jerusalem! Egypt! Bethlehem!–always by donkey! Other than that they were always in Nazareth just living. Jesus had 30 YEARS with Joseph and Mary living “ora et labora” and spent only THREE YEARS preaching and healing and defying the Pharisees.
So to me, this year with the Advent of MY son, I see these mysteries in a new way. I hope these humble reflections help you enter deeper into the mystery of that family. Which, the greatest mystery of all, is that they were so very ordinary.
Cathedral Young Adults 